June 18th - Powell Stalls, Trump Threatens, Iran Snaps, and Zuck Spams
From the Fed’s flop era to Middle East brinksmanship, NYC arrests to soggy Girl Scouts—and yes, Meta just violated your group chat.
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1. Fed Hits Snooze on Rate Cuts
The Federal Reserve just did… nothing. Again. No rate cuts, no hikes—just vibes and spreadsheets. Jerome Powell said the economy’s still "too spicy" for cuts (aka inflation is clinging on like your ex who doesn’t get the hint). They’re now projecting one lonely rate cut for the rest of 2025, down from the three we were promised. Wall Street’s throwing a mini tantrum, markets dipped, and everyone’s side-eyeing the next CPI report like it’s the real main character. Basically: money’s still expensive, Powell’s still stingy, and we’re all still broke.
2. Trump Says “Unconditional Surrender” or Else
Trump, who’s now deep into his military cosplay era, just told Iran to give up unconditionally—yes, like we’re in a Call of Duty cutscene. After weeks of airstrikes between Israel and Iran, Trump’s turning the volume way up, demanding Iran end all nuke activity and military escalation, or face U.S. military action. The Pentagon’s like “we’re assessing” (read: panicking), and Congress might step in to debate war powers. TL;DR: Trump’s going full 2003 vibes while the world collectively screams “NOT THIS SEASON AGAIN.”
3. NYC Comptroller Arrested at Protest
Brad Lander, NYC’s own numbers guy (a.k.a. the city comptroller), just got cuffed and stuffed at an immigration protest in Brooklyn. He was out there protesting Trump’s ICE crackdowns, holding signs, chanting—and then boom, arrested by the very government he’s budgeted for. He later called Trump’s administration a “fascist regime,” which, bold. But let’s be real: when the guy who audits your payroll gets dragged out by cops, the vibes are off. Democracy’s in her flop era and even accountants are fighting in the streets.
4. U.S. Embassy in Jerusalem Shuts Down
The U.S. just closed its embassy in Jerusalem for three days because things are getting way too hot—and not in a “cute rooftop bar” kind of way. With Israel’s beef with Iran boiling over, and Trump dialing up the military threats, embassy staff basically packed their bags and said, “BRB, self-preservation.” Security concerns are real, and while the State Department framed it as “precautionary,” it’s giving bunker energy. If the embassy’s out, you know it’s messy.
5. Meta Ruins WhatsApp with Ads
WhatsApp—aka your safe space for group chats, oversharing, and late-night voice notes—is officially getting ads. Meta (Mark Zuckerberg’s chaotic empire) announced that they’ll start shoving ads into WhatsApp Channels, aka the new broadcast feature, and possibly more later. Remember when Zuck promised the app would stay ad-free forever? Yeah… that aged like milk. So now you’ll get auntie conspiracy memes and skincare promos, all in one place. Privacy who? This is capitalism, baby.
6. Girl Scouts vs. Flash Flood
Over 100 Girl Scouts had the most chaotic camping trip ever when flash floods hit their site near Pittsburgh. Picture this: s’mores, kumbaya, then suddenly the creek’s like “surprise!” and the whole camp had to evacuate. Emergency crews rescued everyone—no injuries, just trauma and soggy merit badges. But now the internet’s out here like “see, this is why I don’t camp.” Honestly? Valid. Nature said “survival badge, but IRL.”
7. Iran to U.S.: Touch Me and It’s Over
Iran’s Supreme Leader Ayatollah Khamenei just dropped the geopolitical version of “pull up, I dare you.” In a rare public warning, he said if the U.S. officially joins Israel’s war effort, it would cause “irreparable damage” to America. No specifics, just pure ominous energy. It’s giving final boss monologue. This comes right after Trump’s whole “unconditional surrender” demand to Iran, so yeah—tensions are sky-high and everyone’s flexing like it’s nuclear brinksmanship for TikTok views. The whole thing feels one bad tweet away from disaster.
That’s all for today but don’t forget to follow us on IG @TheDailySkews — your daily plug for the memes and the messy headlines. Stay cute, stay informed, and don’t forget to #SkewTheNews. ✌️
Sources: NYT, CBS, The Guardian, BBC, Reuters.